Growing Pains

Pain is life’s way of getting our attention and letting us know something has to change. That’s why it’s essential to be flexible and cultivate resilience and adaptability. Change is inevitable, as nothing ever stays the same. While we often view it as either good or bad, it’s important to remember that that’s just our own limited perspective, which itself can shift as we get more insight over time. Just as the branches of a tree bend and move with the breeze, we must also be pliable and willing to adjust as needed. When we remain rigid in our thoughts and beliefs on how things must be in order for us to be happy, then we are setting ourselves up for pain and disappointment.

“We can’t become what we need to be by remaining what we are.”

Oprah Winfrey

As we shift and transform our thoughts, we will find that our lives reflect those shifts as well. One day all may be going along as we expect, and the next we may feel like the rug has been pulled out from underneath us. When we feel hurt or vulnerable, we instinctively try to protect ourselves; yet as we heal, we become stronger and that wall we built around our tender feelings can begin to feel constricting, and we become restless. That restlessness is the desire for more than we are currently allowing ourselves to do, have, or be.

While it is important to learn and develop new skills and perspectives throughout our lives, it can sometimes be painful to get out of our comfort zone and let go of previously held thoughts, ideas, and beliefs, yet this change is undeniably essential for growth. We can compare it to growing pains, similar to what happens as we physically grow from childhood into adulthood. It was often uncomfortable, but in order to be who we are today we had to go through those changes.

“Life will only change when you become more committed to your dreams than you are to your comfort zone.”

Billy Cox

Our ‘story’ is always in motion and as we move from one phase to another in our lives, such as when we begin or end a relationship, start a new job, become a parent, reach middle age, or any other milestone, we are leaving parts of our old self behind so that our new, expanded version of our identity can express itself. In other words, part of us must ‘die’ so another part can be ‘born’. When we understand this and choose to allow ourselves to feel wonder and curiosity as these changes occur, rather than resisting them, we can take the opportunities presented to us to create the life we want.

“Big changes don’t have to be hard, but they do have to start with a choice. This is where real change begins; this is where you start taking control of your life and how you choose to live it…” 

Nathalie Thompson

We can reach our potential if we surrender to the inevitable evolving (changing) nature of life. As we begin the next phase of our lives, it is imperative to understand that nothing can stay the same, but by giving ourselves permission to take care of ourselves and do what makes us happy, and we embrace the new with an open mind and gratitude in our hearts, we allow for an even better life to emerge. Give yourself permission to nurture yourself today.

“You begin to fly when you let go of self-limiting beliefs and allow your mind and aspirations to rise to greater heights.”

Brian Tracy